CatNav, Bionics and other Catty Powers

 
"The smallest feline is a masterpiece." (Leonardo da Vinci

). Never was a truer phrase uttered. 

It is with some pride that I applaud my fellow kin for demonstrating this truth so ably.

Last week Oscar (above) got custom-made artificial implants to replace his hind paws and is now truly Bionic - cue Oscar running in slow motion, with the voice over ".....we have the power to rebuild him......da da da daaaaaaa da da da da da da da da daaaaaaaa" (for those of you younger than 30 [I am 42 in Cat years], I am of course referring to the Six Million Dollar Man!). Now it is fair to say that Oscar must have been at the back of the queue when God handed out brains (the catty-word-on-the vine is that it is not a good idea

to take a nap in a  field with a combine harvester!) and if I were his owners I would get him a hearing aid too, since apparently he didn't hear the said machinery!

And then there is the heroic Karim, who having been left by his owner with caring neighbours (because she worried that he would not like to move to a new house), using what can only be described as "CatNav" turned up at his old owner's house 2000 miles away having trekked across Russia for two years!


My power? Well I am the James Dyson of the Catty World, currently developing a few ideas which my male owner (or as I prefer to refer to him "my staff") will present to Dragons' Den - I have still not forgiven him for poo-pooing my idea of "Ears on Crash Helmets", but as any cat will tell you, we all have enormous patience with the limitations of the Human-kind.
Strictly on the catty-down-low, in development are;-

• Infra-red-paw-activated-fridge-openers;
• Scratching-post-food-dispensers for cats who like to multi-task;
• Catty-Alchemy; turning water into milk

"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior"(Hippolyte Taine). 
My female owner is under the misapprehension that I spend 16 or so hours a day asleep, when I am in actuality, working through complex design problems in my mind. To all my dear Followers, remember - I am Cat. A puzzle for which there is no solution.