My female owner has just started to go to a class she calls Pilates. She went to her first session last week, and I was rather surprised that she did not return with an eye patch, a peg-leg and a parrot!
Apparently this Pilates is some sort of class where she learns to stretch, gain flexibility, core strength and awareness to support efficient and graceful movement. AHEM!!!! Female owner........does anybody you know already know how to do all of that?
Do you not marvel everyday when I wake and stretch? Don't you wish that you could elongate every muscle in your body as I do? Am I not as graceful as...well ...a Cat?
It seems I am missing a trick here - apparently you Humans will pay others to teach you how to do what we Cats have been doing for millennia! And we've been showing this expertise to you for free! Not even a tin of Whiskas has passed between us for this wisdom!There you sit at your desk in front of your flickering screen.....well look at you now....slumped, hunched forward, stressed.
Take five minutes with me now - I have been busy catching my usual 40,000 winks (some Catty maths for you - 40,000 winks = 40,000 secs = 11.1 hours sleep) and am about to go through my usual Catty stretches (which I believe you Humans have stolen and now call "Yoga").
Yogi Patterson's five minute stretch - to be done very very slowly
1. Sit up straight. Inhale. Raise your front paws above your head, and place your palm-paws against one another. Interlace all your fingers, except your index finger. Allow these fingers to rest against one another. Exhale. Hold and breath in and out slowly. Gently lean backward, allowing the spine to arch slightly. Look up. If the back of your chair is at the right level, you can lower yourself backward and use it as a support for the posture.
2. Sit upright. Inhale. Place your left paw on your right thigh, or on the right arm of your chair. Place your right paw on the back of the chair. As you exhale, gently twist your body around to the right. Hold and breathe slowly in and out.
Return to center. Repeat the pose on the other side.
3. Sit upright. Inhale. Place your left paw on your thigh, or the arm of your chair. Lift your right paw upward. As you exhale, lean your body to the left, using the arm of your chair as a support. Hold, and breath slowly in and out.
Return to centre. Repeat the pose on the other side.
4. Sit up straight. Inhale. Bend right paw at elbow, lift it and place it between your shoulders on your back behind you head. Bend the left paw at the elbow, and place it between your shoulders on your back and try to touch the fingers of your right paw. Breathe slowly in and out. Return to rest. Repeat the pose on the other side.
Now bring your two palm-paws together and bow.
Don't know about you, but I have the munchies now! Catty-kibble here I come!
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