My male owner had "man flu" last week - whilst feeling sympathy for him with his runny nose and sneezing fits, needless to say I raised our household "Germ-Alert-Threat-Status" from Amber to Red, and frantic paw washing was instigated so that I and my female did not catch the dreaded virus! I must keep her well, since upon checking the larder, I noticed that I was down to my last two tins of cat food, and I have yet to embrace Internet Shopping!
They say that the virus is not transferable from human to animal, but with the amount of fussing and kissing (Brrrrrrrr...yuk!!) I get from both my owners I am taking no chances, and in any event, I am sure they said that about swine-human transfer 30 years ago!!
After dashing off a quick typed checklist (below) for both my owners listing the early symptoms of Cat Flu to enable swift intervention, and purchasing my swine flu mask, I realised to my horror that there is no insurance upon my person!
I can understand that investing in Catty Life Insurance would be fruitless, because in order for the Company to pay out I would have to die nine times! But to have no "health insurance" is worrying. I have seen the state of the Human National Health Service and to be honest I am more of a "Private-Room-One-to-One-Care" sort of Cat! I just don't "do" rows of Cat-beds in crammed wards with harassed nurses, and would require hourly health checks, First Class food and regular fussing to recover from any ailment!
Until such health insurance is instigated I have decided to have a self-imposed "house arrest", which is timely, since the weather has taken an Autumnal turn to the colder and wetter, and so this has conveniently provided me with the excuse not to leave the house for almost a week!
As always, I like to take the "belt and braces" approach, and so taking my lead from the sort of "restroom" cleanliness checking schedules I have seen in restaurant/service station establishments, I have set up a spreadsheet detailing the following symptoms, and have stuck this on my female owners' office door, with hourly check boxes for her to initialise, having inspected me for the onset of any symptoms.
If she forgets to make such checks, I have kept my claws sharpened on her leather chair, and a swift "reminder claw swipe" should suffice!
I think I may be in danger of becoming a hypochondriac.....or it may be that it is the big brain tumour I may have that is making me think I am a hypochondriac! Hmmmmmmm?
I think I may be in danger of becoming a hypochondriac.....or it may be that it is the big brain tumour I may have that is making me think I am a hypochondriac! Hmmmmmmm?
The Eyes: swollen and red with a "pus like" discharge? | 09:00 initial when checked | 10:00 | 11:00 | 12:00 – 21:00 etc |
The Nose: sneezing; discharge? (first clear then, dear God, turning thick and green); loss of sense of smell? | ||||
Fever; loss of Appetite: dehydration and refusal to drink water? | ||||
The Mouth and Tongue: ulceration of tongue, palate, lips; tip of nose; drooling? | ||||
Joint pain? Limping? | ||||
Paws: ulcers? |
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